What is the difference between a coup, a revolt, a revolution and an insurgency?

 According to the not yet famous “21. Century American Bureaucratic Dictionary of Hypocrisy” the following definitions are expected to be used in all communications:

Coup: An open military intervention against a government. If the government was against us the intervention will be defined as a “positive step towards democracy” If the coup against a government we do not support fails, it never happened.

Revolt: An uprising of a group of bad people against a government we support. Local police should be sufficient to suppress. If it happens against a bad govetnment then we call the event “a glorious uprising”

Revolution: A successful revolt and a very bad thing. It should be tried to recruit the new government first. If they disagree military intervention should be considered. There is no good revolution for the last 200 years.

Insurgency: The fighting back of the people after a country is bombed and invaded following a decision of military intervention. If these people are fighting anybody but us then they will be called “freedom fighters” and armed.

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